While men and women deviate more from gender norms than they ever have in the past, gender still plays a role in how both experience and cope with divorce. It has less to do with gender norms and more to do with the realities individuals face based on their gender. Read on to learn more about how both genders deal with divorce even in this modern day and age.
- Divorce has a tendency to be more difficult for men than it is for women: While there are no absolute rules in how people handle divorce, men generally have a harder time with it. Why? Men are often expected to tamper their emotions and keep any difficulties they might be having to themselves. They are encouraged to solve their problems on their own rather than ask for help, which can put a huge amount of stress and pressure on them. It is also common for men to base a large part of their personal identity on their role as the family provider. Without their marriage and without a cohesive family, men experience a sense of loss, which might further plunge them into depression.
On the other hand, women are said to emotionally adjust to divorce far better than men due to their ability to be more in tune with their emotions than their male counterparts. It is also a major reason why so many women are often the ones to request a divorce in the first place. Men have a tendency to be under the impression that everything within the marriage is fine, whereas women are likely to point out the negatives of a relationship, leading them to the conclusion that the marriage should come to an end.
- Men and women typically have different concerns: This is 2017 and many women work outside the home and serve as the breadwinner within their household. However, it is still more common for a mother to leave the workforce in order to care for her children than it is for a father to take on this particular role. As such, a divorce often spells out economic instability for many women who have been out of the workforce for some time and they are often likely to suffer financially as a result of the loss of their partner’s income. Men, on the other hand, are often more concerned about holding onto as much of their assets as possible and being able to maintain a consistent relationship with their children during and in the aftermath of their divorce. Fortunately, courts are much less gender-biased these days when it comes to child custody. Consistent and meaningful contact with both parents is generally considered ideal and in the best interests of children.
- The social stigma of divorce: Both men and women will likely have a difficult time being single again. Depending on the duration of your marriage, it is possible you never expected to end up in the dating pool once again. That said, women, particularly single mothers, are often more likely to be stigmatized than divorced men. A divorced mother will generally experience greater difficulty in the dating world than a divorced man. Male divorcees are more likely to remarry time and again, given the ease with which they are able to reenter the dating pool without much stigmatization.
- Gender does not define you: Bear in mind these are merely generalizations and no one should presume to know how you are handling your divorce simply based on your gender. No two divorces are alike and neither are the unique individuals involved. Whether you are a man or woman, if you are having a difficult time coping with your divorce, it would be a good idea to seek help from a psychological counselor to develop or learn new coping skills. Even if you feel perfectly fine, a counseling session might still be able to offer you some perspective about your divorce and prepare you for the next chapter in your life. Being single again is a major change and adjusting to your new life and future will not come without a few bumps in the road. Asking for help will help ensure the transition occurs as smoothly as possible.
Experienced Newport Beach Divorce Attorneys
If you and your spouse have decided to call it quits on your marriage, you will need to seek the skilled and experienced support of a Newport Beach divorce attorney. At Burch, Coulston & Shepard, LLP, our certified family specialists bring more than 130 years of collective experience to the table. We can help you resolve divorce disputes related to child custody and visitation, the division of marital property, high asset divorce, post-divorce modifications, and more.
Get started on your case today and contact us at (949) 565-4158 to schedule a free consultation.