People generally expect divorce to get messy. After all, no one gets divorced because they are happy with their current situation. Additionally, the divorce process itself can be frustrating, costly, and further fuel any feelings of hostility you and your spouse might have for one another. That said, there are actually ways to keep your divorce from making your life and the lives of your family miserable. Remember, you are getting a divorce to start a new chapter in your life that will, hopefully, allow you to find happiness again. Set the right tone by doing what you can to have a smoother, happier divorce.
Below is a list of some tips on how you can have a happier or, at least, a far less difficult divorce:
- It was the right thing to do: No matter who left whom, try to look at this as a positive move. If you left your spouse, chances are that you did it for a good reason and believed it was the best choice and that it would improve your life. If your spouse left you, this might be tough to cope with, but keep in mind that if you two remained in the marriage and he or she was unhappy, both of you would have suffered. It might be painful, but a loveless marriage would never make you happy, so consider this a step in the right direction. If the anger and hurt are too overwhelming, try seeking professional guidance and help.
- Try to be more positive: As the saying goes, fake it until you make it. The more you act happy and look for positive things, or plan for something you can look forward to, the happier you are likely to be. Obsessing over the past or how things could have been done differently will only frustrate you. You should also avoid wasting your energy on telling others how terrible your spouse is and how awful the marriage was. You will gain nothing from it and it will only suck the joy out of your life. Try to focus on what is good and on how you can make your life better.
- Change your story: Divorce is an emotional experience and, oftentimes, spouses might feel like they no longer deserve happiness, or that they are destined to be alone. The more you tell yourself that your life is hopeless, the harder it will be to change the narrative. Instead of letting this become a self-fulfilling prophecy, write your own story and remind yourself that you are loveable and that you have not lost your capacity to feel joy or to continue to pursue a life full of happiness.
Ultimately, the less animosity, hostility, and feelings of self-loathing you harbor, the easier it will become to move forward with a positive outlook, so you can have the best possible start on this new chapter in your life.
Divorce Attorneys in Newport Beach
If you and your spouse are moving forward with a divorce, you are going to need skilled legal representation on your side to ensure your interests are protected. At Burch, Coulston & Shepard, LLP in Newport Beach, our certified family law specialists are backed by more than 130 years of experience and a track record of success. Divorce can be an emotionally taxing experience, so do not try to get through this on your own. Our team is here to help.
Get started on your case today and contact us at (949) 565-4158 to request your free initial case evaluation with one of our knowledgeable attorneys.